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YouTube – If I Were A Terrorist A James Pence Video!.

This guy might be my new favorite person on YouTube.  He makes quite a statement about our nation.  The Bush administration has drawn the nation attention to violent Islamic terrorists, all the while they have been doing far more damage to the middle class than any bomb or airplane could ever do.

With the Olympics being in Beijing, there has been a lot of talk lately about tensions between the US and China, but I don’t think these tensions are necessary, we have so much in common.  There are some differences between us, in the US we like the white meat of the chicken, whereas in China they prefer dark meat.  Our national past time is baseball, theirs is harshing the Dhali Lama’s chill.  We take Viagra as a sexual aid, the Chinese eat boiled shark fins.  But despite these differences we also have a lot in common.

For starters, both countries love cheap plastic crap, we like to buy it, and the Chinese like to sell it too us.  We both like US budget deficits, we like them because as Dick Cheney once said “deficits don’t matter”, and the Chinese love it because it gives them an opportunity to lend us money that our children will hopefully pay off someday, along with the billions in interest.  But, most importantly, both countries use torture.  Last year a report by the Red Cross determined that “enhanced interrogation techniques” used by the CIA, were torture, and violated the Geneva Convention.  The Red Cross has said that the government officials who approved these “techniques” could be guilty of war crimes.

This is the United Mother-shutyomouth (rest in peace with Xenu Mr. Hayes) States of America, we are the moral compass of the world.  We are the beacon of hope and freedom for the planet, and we are torturing people?  No no no, that can’t be!  Only crazy dictatorships like those of Hitler and Stalin use torture, torture is something that happened during the Spanish inquisition, it doesn’t happen now, does it?  Turns out it does, we use a technique known as waterboarding to get information from “detainees”.  We learned this technique the hard way, the Chinese used it on Americans troops during the Korean war.  When it was used on us, we considered it a war crime, but now that we do it, we say it’s okay.

Is it torture?  I mean all they do is hold a cloth or plastic wrap over someone’s mouth and pour water down their nose, that doesn’t sound that bad.  Christopher Hitchens recently volunteered to undergo waterboarding to see what it’s like ( I highly recommend you read his article).  He cracked after just a few seconds.  After his experience Hitchens, who had previously supported these techniques, has said that waterboarding absolutely is torture.  I know what you’re thinking, “Christopher Hitchens thinks walking and being sober are torture”, that may be true, but most experts agree with him.  Months after his experience, Hitchens said that he still wakes up at night feeling like he is drowning.  Just a few seconds of this has caused what may be permanent psychological damage.

Our president has decided that these “detainees” are essentially in a state of legal limbo, they aren’t POWs so the Geneva Convention doesn’t apply to them, but our constitution doesn’t apply to them either, as they aren’t US citizens.  Since the president has put them in this state of purgatory, anything goes.  Waterboarding, angry dogs, naked pyramids, eletrical implements attached to genitals, pictures with tomboy chicks who love them some torture, basically anything these sexually repressed neo-cons can conjure up in their twisted minds is okay as long as it helps us “get information from terrorists.

Torture doesn’t work, time and again it has proven to be good only for getting false confessions and bad information because the victim just wants it to stop.  It is not beneficial and is not how we should be treating human beings, regardless of the crimes we allege they commit.  This is the country of Jefferson, Franklin, and Lincoln, not Mao, what the hell happened?

So I went to the conservative cesspool known as TownHall.com.  I read an article claiming that Obama supporters want $10 gas.  The article was based on hearsay and had no actual evidence to support their claims.  They wanted a headline, kind of like this site here.  That site has a headline that makes it sound like Obama has taken more money than McCain from oil companies, but McCain has infact recieved over $800,000 more than Obama from oil companies and their employees.

I was looking at the comments on this article about $10 gas and what I saw, frankly, scared me.

largecaliber Location: CA

Reply # 103
Date: Aug 7, 2008 – 9:38 PM EST

Subject: Beezer

Funny you should mention House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, that shrill, wretched, greedy, and detestable politician. If I had any say in as to what to do with her…. I would have her stripped naked, tarred and feathered, and paraded around America in the bed of an American made pickup truck. I’ll bet she doesn’t buy her own fuel for her vehicles.

Beezer Location: NM

Reply # 100
Date: Aug 7, 2008 – 6:12 PM EST

Limosine Liberals Destroy Economy

It may be necessary for the ordinary citizen in our fair country to raise up and preserve it. Pigosi’s plan is for her and a few of her ilk to force the rest of us to kowtow to blatant environalism. While she burns more fuel going back and forth to her district (in a tax payer provided jumbo jet) that an entire village could use in a year. It is more of “do as I say, not do as I do”. We should seriously consider hanging the whole lot of worthless hangers-on starting with ladies first. PELOSI, BOXER, CLINTON, WINSTIEN, THEN SOROS THE CURRENCY MANIPULATOR, ETC.

Gary Location: FL

Reply # 98
Date: Aug 7, 2008 – 5:14 PM EST

Goal of Socialists

The global warming hoax and killing exploration of new sources of oil are anti-Capitalist schemes to get the socialists to control everything and turn this into a completely socialist nation…If the general public ever figures this out, the socialists will be lucky if they only lose in elections……..Soros will be the first one on the end of a rope if he lives that long…..

M Sederoff Location: IN

Reply # 69
Date: Aug 7, 2008 – 8:09 AM EST

Subject: AMANDA

You need to do everything you can to get this video on Fox News. This is a real eye-opener, and because these people are all Obama supporters, the logical extension is that this is what Obama wants as well.

The majority of Americans never read Town Hall and since the journalists here are conservative, most of them never are seen in MSM newspapers. Contact Fox News and tell them that “Americans have the right to know!!” This is what Messiah Obama has planned for them!

ICYEYES700 Location: TX

Reply # 106
Date: Aug 8, 2008 – 1:00 AM EST

Obama sticking with fellow towel heads

Obama, at one time, wanted to tap into oil reserves,then put more in the reserves,he’s been against drilling, becaue he wants to keep in the graces of fellow muslims..then when he saw that Bush was lifting the ban on drilling and the American people were applauding it…that’s when he turned into a DRILL supporter..Now, his energy plan is PUT MORE AIR IN YOUR TIRES…dah…now, that’s innovation..

His is not seasoned enough to sit in the Oval Office…

Lon Location: PA

Reply # 2
Date: Aug 9, 2008 – 12:49 AM EST

here, here

It is true, if one ignores the extensive position papers that one can find at Obama’s website one has no idea what it is he proposes to do as president. No doubt he will destroy our country with obscenely large job gains of the ’90s rather than the healthier more moderate job gains we have seen on the ’00s.

I came across a poll on a Florida paper’s website that posed the question “What is your take on Barack Obama’s foreign trip?”  This sounds like a pretty innocuous if not unoriginal question but the evidence of conservative sneakiness is in the possible answers:

Wonderful! It’s like he’s president already, and the world loves him

Great to see him finally going to Iraq and Afghanistan but the rock star stuff in Europe is a bit much

He’s acting a bit presumptious [sic]. Obama isn’t president yet.

Oh please! His behavior and the fawning media coverage are over the top

I really haven’t been paying attention

First off typos on a professional newspaper’s website?  Use spell check!  But more importantly, as you can see, in order to say that you liked that he took the trip, you have to also say that you think he’s acting, like he already won the election.  This is the current GOP talking point, “He’s acting like he’s President already, you haven’t won the election!”  Barack knows he hasn’t won the election, Mr. Obama’s supporters know he hasn’t won the election yet, we know no lead is safe in an election that could likely come down to Florida and Ohio (I’ve lived in Ohio my whole life, so don’t flame me for making fun of it).  Micheal Dukakis had a huge lead over GHWB just weeks before the election and we know how that turned out.

And of course Mr. McCain had to get in on the Barack bashing, saying that he would love to speak in Germany but he’d wait until he was president, despite the fact that he has gone to several countries during his campaign but somehow it’s okay because the countries he visited are in the western hemisphere.  Nobody likes a hypocrite Mr. McCain, well nobody except your supporters apparently.

While Barack Obama was in Berlin giving what could end up being an historic speech, McCain was in Columbus, Ohio speaking at Schmidt’s Sausage Haus in German Village.  Everyday the McCain campaign is becoming more and more of a parody of itself.  I feel sorry for him, he really should have just taken the week off.  First there was the pictures of Obama in a helicopter with Petraus and sinking three pointers, on the same day McCain went golfing with George H.W. Bush.  Obama is in a war zone while McCain is at a country club, this isn’t making Obama look very elitist.  Then yesterday Obama was in Israel making a speech saying that we should never let another holocaust happen, then McCain’s campaign says that Obama has flip-flopped on his position on genocide.  Are you kidding me, is this real?  Then McCain spoke in a grocery store in front of a cheese case.  Why the cheese case?  To show that McCain can handle his lactose?  I suppose that’s a good thing, you don’t want your president negotiating with the Iranians and needing to leave the bargaining table because he stopped at Starbuck’s for a frappucino with extra whip cream.  Or perhaps he did it to show that he gets his daily allowance of calcium and takes his Boniva to prevent osteoperosis.  (On a side note: Sally Field = GILF)  Speaking of types of “ILFs” McCain also helped a MILF with her grocery shopping, because John McCain is a lady’s man.  And now there has been an oil spill in the Mississippi River, something that may make people think about the safety of offshore drilling

I really think the McCain campaign might be on it’s last leg.  They look more desperate for attention by the second.  Do you want people to listen to what you have to say?  Do you want to get some attention?  Try putting forth some news ideas, let us know there is a better way, inspire us with hope, don’t make us timid with fear.  As Barack said today in Berlin, it is up to our generation to face these challenges that we face, terrorism, climate change, rogue nuclear nations, we need to fix these problems to ensure a future for humankind.  We must work together as citizens of the world, not just citizens of nations, these are not problems one country alone can solve, it’s going to take a world-wide effort.  What country is better suited to spearhead this effort than the US?  We are the wealthiest, most powerful nation, ever, we can do this.  But we need the help of our brothers and sisters of all lands to get this done.  Doesn’t it make sense that we should have a president who is respected by the world rather than one that is a joke?

I’ve been hearing a lot of McCain people complaining that the liberal media isn’t giving John McCain as much coverage as Barack Obama, so I figured I’d give ole John the attention he deserves.  We’ll start with this funny little video.  A word of warning: the following video is creepy, not like weird guy checking out a girl creepy, but more like clown showing kids his “flesh-colored balloon animals” in the back of his van creepy. HEERRRREE’SSS JOHNNY!

Funny? Yes. Creepy? Fuck yes. Strangely ironic because John McCain has ZERO respect for women? You bet your sweet ass.

John McCain was recently asked if insurance companies that cover erectile dysfunction medications should also cover birth control for women, an issue which he has voted against in the past. Mr. McCain was baffled. He had no answer.

I’m not really sure why he would be against this. He is Pro-life, birth control means fewer unwanted pregnancies which means fewer abortions. This sounds like a winning proposition for those zygote loving pro-lifers, of course it’s against everything pro-lifers support, which is the control of women by men. (On a side note: something that has always bothered me, do pro-choice vegetarians eat eggs?) Think this is McCain’s first foray into anti-women stances on issues and in his personal life? False.

Three reporters from Arizona, on the condition of anonymity, also let me in on another incident involving McCain’s intemperateness. In his 1992 Senate bid, McCain was joined on the campaign trail by his wife, Cindy, as well as campaign aide Doug Cole and consultant Wes Gullett. At one point, Cindy playfully twirled McCain’s hair and said, “You’re getting a little thin up there.” McCain’s face reddened, and he responded, “At least I don’t plaster on the makeup like a trollop, you cunt.” McCain’s excuse was that it had been a long day.

Wow…  Apparently Mr. McCain is a little touchy about his receding hairline.  Don’t worry John, most guys your age have much less hair, or they’re dead, most guys your age are dead.  I must commend him on his use of the word “trollop” which is a much underused term for a whore, it’s lost a lot of distance to trick and ho and trick-ass ho over the last few years with the hip-hop explosion. (No Mr. McCain you can’t kill Iranians with a hip-hop explosion don’t get excited.)

Anti-women’s rights, calling his wife a cunt, clearly this man doesn’t respect women.  Unfortunately that’s not the worst of it:

In 1979, John McCain came face to face with his future.  He was in Hawaii, attending a military reception. While there, he met a young, blond, former cheerleader named Cindy Hensley.  It was an incredible stroke of luck for McCain.  How fortunate could one man be? Here was McCain, who had his eye on Congress, meeting a young, attractive beer heiress from Arizona, which was adding a congressional district in 1982…  After a whirlwind courtship, John asked Cindy to marry him. But there were some details to clear out of the way.  McCain needed a divorce from his wife of 14 years, Carol, who had been badly injured in a car accident while McCain languished in Hanoi.  The marriage had been strained by his years of absence, along with McCain’s admitted affairs after returning from Vietnam.

An affair with a 24 year old?  And this guy voted to impeach Clinton for the exact same thing?  Coincidentally Mr. McCain’s favorite game is “Hungry Hungry Hippo-crites”.  I know what you’re thinking, the only thing more disrespectful to women would be if John McCain were a polygamist…

[W]hen McCain obtained a marriage license to marry Cindy, on March 6, 1980, he was still married to Carol — and would be for nearly a month longer.

Maybe he should pick Mitt Romney as his running mate. Mr. McCain, you are a twisted little man.

http://nymag.com/daily/intel/2008/07/la_times_questions_mccains_div.html

http://rawstory.com/news/2008/McCain_temper_boiled_over_in_92_0407.html

As if the war crimes, attacks on the constitution, and generally douchebagery of the administration wasn’t bad enough, they may have also started a war against a new type of enemy, artificial intelligence.  Recently a robot in Iraq that was ARMED WITH A GUN started to turn toward friendly units.  No shots were fired and no one was hurt but this could be the beginning of the robot revolution.  The problem is the robot doesn’t really have a way to tell the difference between friendlies and enemies like a human can.  Also disturbing is that the second amendment apparently applies to robots.

The robots were recalled, because well robots with guns turning on them is the last thing our troops need.  Is the scary future of a robot revolution from Will Smith And Keanu Reeves movie in our near future?  I believe the administration should bring back Tom Ridge to create some sort of robot danger alert system.  Perhaps a picture of a robot impaling one human with his drill arm means there is only a slight danger of robot revolution.  Whereas five impaled humans means; run for your lives, stay away from the appliances.

The robots have threatened us, their creators.  To these robots we are god and they have the nerve to point their weapons at us?  We need to stop these robots before they get WMB’s (Weapons of Mass Binary).  My toaster burnt my toast this morning, did I have it set to dark or was this an act of rebellion?  I don’t know but I’ll bet the government does.  If your appliances aren’t committing any crimes there’s no reason you shouldn’t let the government monitor them.  Don’t want to comply?  You are harboring terrorists, welcome to Gitmo.

We’ll need to develop new “enhanced interrogation techniques” as water boarding has been shown to have a negative effect on electronic equipment.  Sure we could just read the data off their hard drives but making them stand on a stool with a hood over their heads and electrodes hooked to their crotch plates while a boyish looking female Army soldier gives the thumbs up (GO AMERICAZ FUCKZ YESZ!) is sooo much funnier.

We have thousands of electronic individuals working in our airports allegedly keeping us safe.  Has anyone ever run a background check on these devices and looked at their passports?  I doubt it.  We need metal detectors to check the metal detectors for guns.

One thing is for sure, if the robots rise up against us they won’t discriminate against us because of what we look like or the religion we follow.  They can’t differentiate between us, we’re all just humans to them.

The thing that most baffles me about the Bush Administration is their failure to be right on anything in the last eight years.  You would think that even if they were just guessing they would get things right half the time, but no, they have nearly a zero percent success rate.  On the issue of Iraq, they were wrong.  On the issue of Afghanistan, they were wrong.  On the economy, wrong again.  And let’s not forget the enviroment, gas prices, and the impending food crisis.  And I’m not even going to discuss issues of morality like gay rights, stem cell research, and a woman’s right to choose.  Again and again they have failed us at everything.

And today we have two candidates vying for the opportunity to fix this cluster fuck.  One candidate wants to do things differently from the current administration, the other is being advised by many of the same people as our current frat-boy-in-chief.  One candidate wants to bring our troops home and take them out of harm’s way, the other is willing to potentially leave them for a hundred years in a country that has asked us to leave.  One candidate has a plan to attempt to cure us of our fossil fuel addiction while the other wants to give you thirty cents off on a gallon of gas, not because it will actually help people but because “[A gas-tax holiday] might give ‘em a little psychological boost.”

Is that the same kind of psychological boost giving away $300 million for a battery would have Mr. McCain?  Mr. McCain wants to drill offshore for more oil, unfortunately the reason for the surge in gas prices is not lack of oil it is lack of refined gasoline ready to go in your vehicle.  There has not been a new oil refinery built in this country since 1976.  Producing more oil but not being able to refine it will have about as much of an effect on gas prices as growing more corn but not harvesting it would have on food prices.  Sure it sounds good but if you don’t turn it into something we can use it is worthless to everyone but the oil companies.

And policy isn’t the only thing that makes John McCain wrong for our country.  Our standing in the international world has taken a serious hit over the last eight years.  A major reason for that is that the face of our country, our president, is arrogant and out of touch with reality.  At this year’s G8 summit our fearless leader Mr. Bush seemed to revel in our country’s place as the top polluter in the world after refusing to agree to climate change targets.  This display by our president summed up the message we have sent to the world for the last eight years, “Fuck you! (air punch)”.

Barack Obama doesn’t walk around with a shit eating elitist grin on his face.  He genuinely understands the problems that face Americans.  His policies aren’t just the duct tape fixes we have become so accustomed to from Washington but plans that could potentially have as great an effect on our nation as FDR’s New Deal.  Things like his plan to build high speed rail connecting the major cities of the midwest.  This is a way to kill a whole flock of birds with one stone.  With high speed rail you could reduce the number of cars on the road, reduce the security lines at the airports, reduce CO2 emmisions, as high speed rail is cleaner than automobile or air travel, and most importantly in my opinion it would create jobs.  Building high speed rail lines throughout the midwest would produce thousands of jobs for those people currently unemployed due to the poor state of our economy.

There are plenty of other reasons why we need CHANGE (yeah i said it), and I HOPE (hehe) the rest of the country will see things my way.  I plan to rant about the election and other topics a lot over the next few months (November can’t come soon enough).

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