Roger Simon of Politico.com has written a brilliant column on the media’s coverage of the Palin pick. I’ve posted part of it here, read it all after the jump.
ST. PAUL, Minn. — On behalf of the media, I would like to say we are sorry.
On behalf of the elite media, I would like to say we are very sorry.
We have asked questions this week that we should never have asked.
We have asked pathetic questions like: Who is Sarah Palin? What is her record? Where does she stand on the issues? And is she is qualified to be a heartbeat away from the presidency?
We have asked mean questions like: How well did John McCain know her before he selected her? How well did his campaign vet her? And was she his first choice?
Here are some facts about John McCain’s choice for Vice President, Sarah Palin:
(1) She is presently under investigation in Alaska for abuse of power
Sarah Palin is being investigated for abuse of power (7/08) after she fired the Dept. of Public Safety Commissioner Walt Monegan. Palin pressured Monegan to fire her sister’s ex husband who is a state trooper. When Commissioner Monegan refused, Palin fired him.
(2) She strongly supports big oil
Palin is aligned with the oil industry on two key issues. She favors drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge and many offshore areas. Palin represents one of the few real petro-states within the United States. Big Oil is big business in Alaska, and the state relies on oil and gas tax and royalty revenues for more than 80 percent of its budget. The state’s coffers runneth over; every resident of Alaska gets a check from the state, a dividend for his or her share of the oil and gas extracted from the ground. Oh, and Palin’s husband works as a field operator for BP, one of the main operators on the North Slope. Oil interests are largely Alaska’s interests.
Of course, Alaska is near Russia so she must call Moscow all the time, since Putin gives a shit about Alaska and all. Steve Doocy may very well be the stupidest man on television.
John McCain’s running mate Sarah Palin, the Republican Governer of Alaska, is, according to all of the coverage I’ve seen about her, a big fan of moose meat. But does she like the taste of my favorite animal, the polar bear too? Here’s a quote from an op-ed she wrote for the New York Times in January:
…(P)olar bears are magnificent animals… They are worthy of our utmost efforts to protect them and their Arctic habitat. But adding polar bears to the nation’s list of endangered species, as some are now proposing, should not be part of those efforts.
The world’s polar bear population is estimated at just 25,000, according to her piece. The habitat of polar bears is changing quickly due to global warming. Something needs to be done to save these amazing, ass-kicking creatures, but Mrs. Palin doesn’t want them added to the endangered species list. Why you may ask? Well she says it’s because the population of polar bears in here state has remained stable for the last 20 years. That’s not to say that their populations aren’t hurting elsewhere, but in her state, so far, they’re okay.
How could any person have such hatred in their heart for such amazing animals? Bears are just minding their business, catching salmon in Alaska’s beautiful rivers, eating honey, and hanging out with their donkey and ti(g)ger friends and Gov. Palin wants to fly by in a helicopter and kill them and make them into blankets and rugs.
This could be a disaster for John McCain, the last thing the Republicans need is bears protesting their convention. Just in case there are some bears reading this, I have some suggestions for protest signs:
- Palin don’t cares about bears
- Bears are people too
- I wish Republicans hibernated
- I’m not a rug
- Stay out of my uterus (She is against abortions for people, I can only assume she’s against them for bears, because an aborted bear is a bear she can’t shoot.)
I have an idea as to why Gov. Palin is against putting polar bears on the endangered species list. If polar bears are labeled endangered, oil companies won’t be able to drill for oil in areas the bears call home. You might be wondering why Gov. Palin would be trying to protect oil companies, I did too, until I read that her husband is an employee of BP. Apparently John McCain feels that big oil doesn’t have enough influence in Washington, so having the wife of an oil man a heartbeat (a weak, frail, old, heartbeat) away from the presidency is a great idea. Personally I think we and the bears are all fucked.
Joe Biden! But if you’re like me, you already know that because you’ve had you’re cell phone on you at all times this week you getting a boner every time you got a message because it might be the one. And you were awaken by your cell phone at 3 am (apparently Barack thinks we can all answer the 3 am phone call.
Joe is a six-term Senator from the state of Delaware (Hey, it’s bigger than Rhode Island). He is a guy who says what’s on his mind, which is good because he can go after McCain for Obama. He once said that Rudy Guliani constructs a sentence with a noun, a verb, and 9/11. I think he’s a good pick, but I really don’t think the Vice Presidential nominee is a huge deal. But this has become a media circus. There have been camera crews and helicopters over the homes of the possible picks. Chet Edwards comes straight out of fucking nowhere to be a possible candidate. Who the Fuck is Chet Edwards? We get to see Evan Bayh in his kitchen eating yogurt. LEAVE EVAN BAYH ALONE!! I’M SERIOUS!!!
This is why I watch The News Hour with Jim Lehrer, I may be the only person under seventy who watches it, but I do. They aren’t showing me Evan Bayh eating yogurt in his kitchen. Do you know why? It’s because they don’t give no fucks about ratings. They simply give you the straight news, the stuff that matters, the issues. I don’t care if Joe Biden ordered a pizza, or what his mailman has to say about it. I don’t care if Joe Biden “took a dump” in his truck. I want to know what he thinks about the conflict in Georgia. I haven’t heard much coverage of his trip to the region but I’ve seen coverage of him bringing bagels to reporters.
The worst part of it is that it all plays into this “Obama is the biggest celebrity in the world” bullshit. This accusation by the McCain campaign isn’t so much a swipe at Obama as it is a swipe at the American people and our celebrity obsessed culture. I keep hearing talking heads asking, “Why isn’t Obama pulling ahead?”. IT’S BECAUSE YOU ASSHOLES WON’T TELL PEOPLE ABOUT THE ISSUES!!!! You tell us he doesn’t wear a flag pin. You tell us his middle name is Hussein. Stop, please, it’s out of control.
John McCain has no idea how many homes he owns, which to me isn’t a huge issue by itself, I’m sure a lot of men married to ultra-rich women have no idea how many homes their wives own. The issue with McCain’s houses is that the McCain campaign has been trying to portray Obama as an elitist because he “eats arugula” and “vacations in Hawaii” but the fact of the matter is McCain is far more of an elitist than Obama ever could be.
Barack used the money he made off his first book to pay off his student loans. Paying off student loans is something a lot of middle class Americans can relate to. McCain spends more on hired help for his homes every year than the average person spends on a home. McCain is out of touch with the American people and that is becoming more and more apparent by the day. McCain has used Obama’s attacks on this issue as a reason to bring up Tony Rezko. The situation with Rezko is a little strange and I’m sure Obama regrets it, but I don’t think McCain should start talking about scandals, remember the Keating Five? John McCain was involved in a scandal that many retired people lost their life savings in, Obama saved some money on a piece of property. I think the lesson for McCain here is people who live in glass houses (no matter how many of them they own) shouldn’t throw stones, unless of course they were a POW in which case they can use that as a rebuttal for anything.